The Enneagram: Type 9 - The Peacemaker
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The Peacemaker is the ninth personality type in the Enneagram. Type 9s are laid-back and emotionally stable. They are understanding, trusting and accepting of others and have a great yearning for peaceful relationships. They support others well and are excellent listeners, but can be too willing to go along with others to keep the peace. They would rather conform to the demands of a forceful person rather than argue with them, as conflict makes them deeply uncomfortable.
Related Enneagram articles:
Enneagram Type 1 Personal Development Plan
Enneagram Type 2 Personal Development Plan
Enneagram Type 3 Personal Development Plan
Enneagram Type 4 Personal Development Plan
Enneagram Type 5 Personal Development Plan
Enneagram Type 6 Personal Development Plan
Enneagram Type 7 Personal Development Plan
Enneagram Type 8 Personal Development Plan
Enneagram Type 9 Personal Development Plan
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Creative and optimistic, Type 9s love to look on the bright side of life. They make a habit of accentuating the positive, often minimizing upsetting things and denying problems or feelings that they find difficult to deal with. They seek to maintain their peace of mind and harmony in their surroundings at whatever cost and resist disturbing influences as much as they can. They love to bring people together and heal conflicts and if they had one wish, it would be for world peace. However, their stubborn unwillingness to acknowledge difficult issues can lead to complacency and stagnation. Totally unprepared to stand up for themselves and be an individual, they would much prefer to blend into the crowd and be carried by the tide.
Type 9s are most attracted to the spiritual world, and long for a deep connection with the divine. They often do not feel very grounded at all, which leads them to be disengaged and even distant. Their emotions may be difficult to read, or even non-existent, as the Peacemaker continually disregards themselves in favor of peace. Withdrawing from the world, they may retreat into their private thoughts and dreams, which they never usually feel the need to share. They have a great deal of energy, but choose not to use it as it may disrupt their peace. Loathe to display personal power, they may allow their inner lives to become blank and static.
Underneath the Type 9s’ need for peace is a fear of loss and separation. By not differentiating themselves as an individual, they feel that others are less likely to reject them or separate from them. They make themselves as unobtrusive as possible to avoid confrontation, because they fear that confrontation will lead to loss - the break up of a relationship, the loss of a job, or some other situation that leaves them bereft.
A powerful realization for a Type 9 is that though peace is the ideal, it is not true peace if it is premature. Harmony requires everyone's needs to be met for it to be genuine. It should not depend on people having to deny themselves and their own needs. At times, Type 9s will have to stand up to assert their rights and needs when others try to impose on them. Although instigating a conflict is the last thing Peacemakers want to do, they must recognize the responsibility they have to their own needs as well as their responsibility to peaceful and harmonious relationships. When they acknowledge this, they can take great strides in their personal growth and come closer to knowing who they truly are.
When 9s develop skills of assertiveness, they find that conflict can be healthy. Through honest discussion, people can let their needs be known to each other so that they can adapt their responses and interactions. Type 9s can only be part of mutually-fulfilling relationships when they allow the other party to compromize and adapt to their needs, just as they have been compromizing and adapting for the other. A huge part of their self-development is to allow themselves to feel the pain of relationship conflict, so they can enjoy the greater understanding and closer bond as a result.
The ultimate step in the personal growth of a Type 9 is for them to connect to what is known as the dark side of life. Understanding that unpleasant things are as much a part of life as pleasant things may be a bitter pill to swallow, but it will go a long way to empower a Type 9 and connect them to their own true selves. When they can connect with their own hurt and painful emotions, they find a part of themselves there that they had previously denied. This part is will give them strength to allow themselves to become a differentiated individual and grow confident enough to stand on their own two feet.
- Iman Mohiki