Psychology, Neuroleadership, & Neurofeedback
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How to Find Peace and Overcome Anger

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Anger is a natural emotion and it is not always a bad thing. However, if anger is consuming you and spilling over into the various aspects of your life, it is time to do something about it. You can work to control your anger so that your emotions do not get the best of you. This is a process and not something people do overnight, so you should practice patience and work through it. There are several tips and techniques that you can start putting into practice today that will help you to achieve emotional control and peace.

You Are in Control

This is the most important thing for you to remember and when you are experiencing anger, it can be difficult to keep this in mind. However, you have to tell yourself that you are in control and that you have the power to determine how much your anger affects you. You have the power to determine how much external influences are able to affect you, your mood and your overall state of mind. This is where you will start to take note of the things that make you angry so that you can gain control over them should they present themselves again in the future.

Start Breathing

You see people breathing and counting to 10 on television and in movies when they are getting angry and needing to control themselves. While the media may oversimplify it, this technique does work because it forces you to focus on your breathing instead of what is angering you. The next time a situation arises that gets your blood boiling, get out of your head and take 10 deep breaths. Count each breath in your head and put all of your focus on your breathing so that the issue causing your anger is forced to take a back seat until you regain control.

Practice Tolerance

Everyone has that one person in their life that is able to push their buttons and cause them to quickly become angry. You have to tell yourself that you will no longer allow this person to have this kind of control over you. This will take practice, but it is important that you are able to take full control of your emotions, especially when it comes to people.

Think About the Good Things

When you really think about your life, you will see that you have far more things to be happy about than to be angry about. Spend a few minutes in the morning and before you go to bed thinking about this. This helps you to start your day off in a good frame of mind so that angering things are less likely to get to you. You will also end your day on a positive note.

Choose Your Reaction

Many people think that emotions just happen as the result of a trigger. This is partially true, but when those emotions arise, you can choose how to react to them. For example, if something angers you, you can choose to step away and practice breathing instead of blowing up. Once you start doing this, it will eventually become your normal reaction and you will automatically just start walking away as opposed to remaining in the situation and allowing it to spiral out of control.

Other Techniques that Work to Control Anger

In addition to the information above, there are a few other things that you can do to help control your anger. These are quick and simple and they include:

·         Drink a glass of water and this helps to calm you

·         Work on taking life less seriously overall

·         Practice positive thinking at all times, including during stressful situations

·         Respect other people’s opinions no matter how much it differs from yours

·         Work on being more patient with people and situations


Do not get overwhelmed with all of the information presented here. These tips and techniques are actually very simple and something that everyone can put into practice. The key is to start with one, master it and then work toward incorporating the others into your life. The ultimate goal with this process is finding peace so that when anger does occur, you have the control. You will still experience anger, and that is not a bad thing. The difference now is that you can use this information to keep it in check so that it does not take over your life again. 

- Rosemary Kitchen

Resources

http://web.csulb.edu/~tstevens/b-anger.htm

http://www.apa.org/topics/anger/control.aspx

 

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