Overcome Shyness and Take Charge of Your Life

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Most people feel shy at least once in their life and this shyness can inhibit you from getting the most out of a situation. Shyness also prevents people from asking for help and it can reduce the chances of meeting people who will have a major impact on your life. The good thing is that shyness is not something that you just have to deal with. You can reduce your shyness and become a more forward and outgoing person so that you never have to worry about shyness getting in the way of good things again.

Start with People You Are Comfortable With

You do not want to throw yourself into a situation that you know will be very uncomfortable when you are just starting out with becoming more forward. Make yourself more forward when you are spending time with the people that you already know and trust, such as friends, coworkers and your classmates. This essentially gives you a practice run and you can use it to work on your social skills so that when you are using your skills on strangers, they do not feel foreign and forced.

You want to work on things like using the right amount of eye contact, asking questions and knowing how to introduce yourself and work with small talk. These are all things that you can learn relatively quickly and the people you trust can actually give you feedback so that you know if you are approaching social situations with confidence and poise.

Rehearse in Advance what You Need to Say

If there is something important you need to do that you have been putting off due to feeling shy, take the time to rehearse what you need to say in advance so that you can enter the situation prepared. When you prepare, you are reducing the risk of something going wrong, helping to make you more confident about what you need to say and do. You only need about 10 to 15 minutes to do this, so it is something you can do quickly, even right before you are ready to head into the situation and address it.

Keep Some Good Conversation Starters Handy

It is always good to go into a situation with a few things in your back pocket that you can use to break the ice. This helps to relieve your shyness and it helps to benefit other people who are feeling shy and vulnerable too. Something as simple as complementing what someone is wearing or asking a quick and simple question can start a conversation that is easy to follow because it will not be too deep or personal for anyone who is involved.

Be Patient with Yourself as You Start to Transform

Remember that you will not wake up tomorrow no longer shy just because you want to make the right changes. You have to be patient with yourself and know that this is a process that is meant to be gradual and long-term. Go easy on yourself and know that slip ups can occur and you can actually use them to learn more about yourself and the journey that you are taking.

Work on Becoming a More Assertive Person

This is probably the scariest step for most people, but you want to become more assertive and this is the biggest benefit of reducing your shyness. You want to be able to be upfront and honest with people at all times. Remember that assertiveness is not being rude, but it is being open and clear about what you want and how you want to accomplish it. You will find that assertiveness also improves many other areas of your life. It will help you in developing your career and in your personal relationships because you will easily be an equal partner.

Keep in mind that shyness is not like a switch that you can turn off and on. If you are a naturally shy person, you will have to work toward becoming a more open and forward person. It is about taking small steps so that you do not overwhelm yourself with feeling like you are trying to be something that you are not. This is not a race and every step toward being a more open person is a positive one that is going to be beneficial in the long-run. Do not rush the process and take the time to enjoy being a more open and less shy you.

References:

http://www.mindpub.com/art030.htm