Jeremy's Stress Management Story

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Stress management involves the use of certain techniques in order to either reduce stress or increase one’s tolerance to future stressors (resilience).  The experience of stress includes physical and emotional effects, and these may produce positive or negative impact upon one’s life.  Stress can be caused by the experience of a threat, watching the news, poor health, or major life transitions such as the death of a friend or family member.  However, one encouraging component of stress includes the fact that it could push somebody to engage with the world in a positive way, which creates a sense of electrifying alertness and openness to new points of view.  The type of stress that I will address in this story about my neighbor is primarily the type of stress that results in irritation and depression.  Afterall, what are the symptoms of anxiety and stress? Perhaps they are none other than a combination of these feelings mixed with fear.

College Experience

My neighbor Jeremy had just completed two years of college and he was always ready to talk with others about their problems and offer solutions no matter what their situation.  Whenever he experienced a bad mood that overwhelmed him, he tried to stay positive and would focus on something that would help him to remain calm and composed rather than harming himself or others.  He was a role model for many of his peers, and he continued offering help to others until he began to recognize that his constant availability was slowly eating away at his energy reserves.  His behavior began to change and he withdrew from his friends and family.  He was constantly thinking about his friend’s problems and the ways in which he could help them, always wanting to be of benefit and not fail to live up to his own expectations of what he should provide.

Positive Motivations

Regardless of his apparently positive motivations, Jeremy avoided his friends and family in order to ensure that they would not share their problems with him and drain his energy.  Jeremy’s most challenging moments were when he had way too much going on in his life – Fraternity events combined with school, work, and problem-solving for his friends and family.  There was always some problem occurring with his friends.  He eventually became increasingly stressed, but he didn’t want anybody to know, so he hid his problems from others in an attempt to maintain his sense of a stable social identity as the problem-solver.  He became so sensitive that he always stayed indoors and avoided social contact, losing self-esteem in the process.  Jeremy was no longer out having fun and going out on the town, and I watched as his happiness dissolved.  His constant striving to be of service to others caused him to psychologically collapse, because he wasn’t being of service to himself.  What are the symptoms of anxiety and stress?  For Jeremy they included working too hard to help others and not taking care of himself.  Perhaps you will still ask, what are the symptoms of anxiety and stress? What are they really, and what are they for me?  Well - they could vary from person-to-person, so you need to evaluate whether or not Jeremy's story seems to contain any clear patterns from which you can learn?

Time To Change

When his family recognized that he was becoming increasingly reclusive and sensitive to stress, they sought the expertise of a therapist.  This was probably one of the best decisions that the family made for him, because once the intervention was staged, he quickly began recovering his strength.

Jeremy recognized that he needed to engage in activities that brought him joy and pleasure in order to reduce his stress levels.  Music was one of his favorite past times, and as a music minor, he always kept his iPod with him and just threw on the headphones in order to get some rhythm.  Meanwhile, he practiced breathing techniques and set aside solitary time where he would focus upon relaxation and regeneration.  Jeremy also reached out to his friends through texting and phone calls, which helped to assure them that everything was OK and to establish healthy contact with a safe social support group.  Consistently returning to these basic resources, Jeremy was able to recover from a period of intense stress and rebuild his resilience.

- Anonymous Contributor