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Is Your Partner Cheating?

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Is he cheating on me? Many people in a relationship ask themselves that question when their partner acts different. Some women and men mistakenly think their partner is cheating on them when their partner starts showing odd behavior. Cheating is cheating, no matter how you justify it.  Yet, couples fail to understand that problems in their relationship can cause their partner to cheat. This is not an article on the psychology of cheating or personal growth.  There are plenty of articles on the Internet that address the psychology of cheating, and how cheating on your partner affects personal growth.

It’s time for you to re-evaluate why your partner cheats on you. Have you ever thought that your behavior is the reason why your partner to cheating? After you discover that your partner is cheating, you blame the other man or the other woman.  Blaming the third party is a natural feeling. No one is perfect, and no relationship is perfect. 

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A wise man told man that a person doesn’t want hell at work and hell at home.  Yet, most people don’t understand this concept until it is too late. But it is not too late if you are still in a relationship. You have to decide you want remain in the relationship.

You have to determine if you want to remain in the relationship. You have to determine the pros and cons. If there are more cons in the relationship, end the relationship.  Sometimes you don’t have that option. It’s okay. If you have to end the relation or your partner no longer wants to be with you, end the relationship knowing that your actions contributed to end of the relationship.

Don’t always assume that your partner is cheating. 

Assuming that your partner is always cheating is the same as giving your partner a free pass. The relationship becomes more complicated when you verbally accuse your partner of cheating.   

Trust is very important.  Your accusations prove that you have trust issues. Don’t over analyze everything. For example, you think your partner is cheating when your partner goes out of town for work or your partner has to work with people of the opposite sex.  Or, you think that everyone wants your partner.

Stop and think. Your partner is thinking that there is no way to resolve the issue, and they should cheat anyway. If you constantly look for something negative in your relationship, you will find it.

Learn how to protect your relationship. 

Your partner always has someone to talk to besides you. Sometimes it is someone of the opposite sex. So, protect your relationship as if you are protecting your paycheck. Your relationship is not supposed to be full of chaos, and everyone doesn’t need to know what is going on in your relationship.  

A person’s home life is supposed to be peaceful. That will require you to maintain a peaceful home life. It can be as simple as cooking, cleaning, and listening. You have to give your partner a reason to come home. 

Many unsatisfied partners vent to someone, seeking advice and someone to listen to their problems. Their conversation should not include problems within their relationship, especially if they are talking to someone of the opposite sex.  It leaves room for the other person take your partner.

Sometimes you have to stroke their ego.  

It is important to make your partner feel wanted and needed. Don’t become helpless. This tactic doesn’t work.  Your partner will start thinking that he or she is in a relationship with a child.  Make your partner feel like an adult.  The main reason why people cheat is because their partner belittles their mate.

This more common with men than with women.  Sometimes you have to let a man be a man, even if he is wrong.  Men like to feel in control. If your man resolves a problem in order to protect his family or his woman, stand behind his decision.

Women also like to feel wanted. Never treat your women as if she is a trophy. Never make her feel that she should be lucky to be with you.  Men and women who feel that they are devalued will seek someone who doesn’t make them feel worthless.

Cheating ends most relationships. It also makes you not trust your partner. There is always a reason why your partner cheats. When your partner decides to be monogamous with you, you have to work twice as hard to keep your partner.

- Heather Browning, MBA, BA
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