5 Steps to a Happy, New Relationship

Whether you are undertaking a search for a new love your simply trying to enjoy a little romance, you have much more control over a successful outcome than you may know.  Here are five useful steps that you can follow to create a new and happy relationship.

1. Let Go of Past Relationship Resentments

Many individuals feel like they need to rush into a new relationship in hopes that it will serve as an emotional painkiller in the wake of a painful rejection or a difficult breakup. 

When you a grieving a past love loss, in practice, however, it makes it difficult to move on.

As hard as it may seem, you need to take time to understand, process and simply move on from your past experiences before attempting to bond with a new someone. 

There are some different ways to help you let go of the past.  For instance, keep your private and honest thoughts in a cathartic journal, or you may find it easier to discuss your feelings of anger or confusion with a therapist. 

The key is to find out how you can avoid making repeated mistakes and help you come to terms with your past experiences. 

You will be ready to move on once you can take a look at past relationships objectively and feel as if you really have learned something from.

2. Put Clear Boundaries in Place

Give your priorities some major thought before you begin your search for a new partner.

Think about what you appreciate in people the most.  If is most important to you to be able to share laughs with your partner, or would you need a more particularly ambitious partner?

Once you build up a rough standard of what you would like your partner to meet in order to make yourself happy, hold potential candidates to this standard.

Don’t let yourself be sold short, but know what is attainable and be realistic. 

It is very important to know what you are looking for in regards to commitment.  A relationship will lead to heartbreak if you are searching for a spouse while your partner is simply searching for some fun for a few months, no matter how attractive that person is to you.

Similarly, you should avoid seeking someone who clearly is looking to spend a lot of time with you while you are more interested in seeing someone a few nights a week casually.

3. Use All Available Resources

Try branching out into the online dating world if you have only every tried meeting your friends of friends or instigating a conversation at bars with attractive strangers.

Many of the hundreds of different sites that are available and many do not charge a joining fee.  In addition, some will be marketed exclusively as being associated with casual or serious dating, while other target people living in specific areas.

Also, keep in mind that there may be events or single nights in your town.  Trying talking a friend into accompanying you to make these social events more comfortable and less daunting.  Along with pursuing deliberate avenues, think about generally spending some extra time simply meeting new people to see what happens!

While an art course or a yoga class will be in its own right interesting and useful, you might also meet someone who is like-minded and accepts a dinner or drink invitation.

4. Be Open-Minded

Even though building up a clear vision of the kind of relationship you are searching for is important, it is also helpful to keep in mind deal-breakers and try not to judge the people you meet before you truly know them.

Spending a couple hours with someone that you might sense isn’t a good match might prove you wrong in a few short hours.  After all, most people have colleagues or friends that at first meeting didn’t make a good first impression!

Try to give the person the opportunity to click with you, but be firm and clear if you choose that there is no appropriate connection or romantic spark.

5. Be Genuine

Lastly, finding a new and happy relationship depends partly on you putting yourself in that relationship.  Even though you naturally want to put forward your best self on the first date, you should also make it important to let your characteristics of uniqueness shine through. 

Don’t be someone who you are not for the sake of suppressing a sense of humor or attracting someone; ultimately a person who likes the real you truly will be much more likely to help you make a happy and lasting relationship.

It is best to find out sooner than later if there is something with another person that simply doesn’t gel.